I originally posted this 1-Off on Facebook.
Longmont, Colorado
December 3, 2017
I want to cut down on or even eliminate cheese from my diet. Somewhere I got the bright idea to try vegan cheese. Friend Mark said to go to Whole Foods in Longmont, CO where they’ll let you sample whatever you want. So off I went with friend Jim, excited about the prospects of a cheese substitute.
I picked out several vegan cheeses that looked almost like real cheese, and the nice Cheese Lady graciously cut open the packages for us to sample. She said she had actually never tasted vegan cheese. Moments later we three were all retching and looking for the spittoons, which it turns out Whole Foods is short of. So we used the Cheese Lady’s rubber-gloved hand. A noble experiment but I’m left wondering: people really eat that shit?
Steve's Memoir 
Your reaction was similar to eating carob and thinking about chocolate!